“A bear is walking through the forest and sees a car on fire. I got into it and burned out” - everyone has probably heard this joke. Sometimes the narrator also adds “The End” or “Shovel” if the listener’s face is very perplexed. However, no one has attempted to explain what the joke is for a long time, although such questions arise constantly. It is believed that this anecdote is especially attractive precisely because of its meaninglessness. But, unlike other “abstract” or “drug” jokes, it enjoys unprecedented popularity: it has many variations, it is drawn on T-shirts, it is used as a universal comment, etc.
Burn, burn, you are my bear
BEAR ACTION PLAN
A man got into a program with Trachtenberg and nothing came into his head except a bearded and stupid joke about a Bear who was walking through the forest, saw a burning car, got into it and burned out. The man begins:
. Well... well... a bear was walking through the forest and saw a burning car...
Trachtenberg:
. I sat in it and burned!
And then the man was struck by a frantic thought and he said:
. Nope! He moved on! He walked and walked and saw a big burning truck...
Trachtenberg:
. Well, got into it and burned out? — Trachtenberg looks a little confused.
Man:
. Nope!!! He went further, which means he went out onto the take-off field, and on this field he saw a burning plane...
Trachtenberg, unable to resist:
. NUUU? Got into it and burned out??!!!
The man finishes with a sense of accomplishment:
. Nope! Damn, he turned around, walked to the first car, got into it and burned out!!
An Arctic bear was walking (this is important, Arctic!) in the Arctic Circle. Suddenly he sees that the car is covered with snow. Well, he sat in it and froze.
rhyme
There is a car standing in the forest at the edge of the forest,
Gasoline streams from a broken tank,
Burning out in the trunk old tire,
There's only one corpse roasting in the salon.
This corpse of a suicide bear,
That I decided to get even with my life at once,
Walking through the forest listening to birdsong,
I decided to do it here and now.
Suddenly, as if hearing his thoughts,
A bright fire broke out at the edge of the forest.
Here the skin is smoking, here the skin is burning,
The bear does not blame anyone for its death.
A bear was walking through the forest and saw a car on fire. I just wanted to get into it, and there was already another bear on fire.
A bear was walking through the forest, saw a car on fire, climbed into it and put it out.
A bear was walking through the forest, he saw a stone, and on it there was an inscription: if you go to the left, you will burn in the car, if you go to the right, you will burn in the car, if you go straight, you will burn in the car. The bear went to the right and saw that the car was on fire. I got into the car and burned out.
A bear was walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. And he moved on, because animals are not capable of realizing such complex phenomena.
Yesterday, investigators found the burned-out carcass of a KIA car in Bitsevsky Park. There was a corpse in the back of the car large mammal, presumably a bear.
The car was burning in the forest. Inexplicably, she attracted animals.
A bear is walking through the forest, sees a car on fire, gets into it and burns, a deer passes by, sees a bear on fire, goes to save it and also burns... A bunny runs, sees this picture, climbed into the back seat because the deer is in the front seat and burned , damn it
The bear was walking through the forest when he suddenly saw a burning car. Suddenly he was suddenly drawn to this radiant heat, to this miniature man-made apocalypse. He roared, stood up hind legs and rushed to the smoking car. Tearing off the back door, he squeezed into the cabin; the hellish heat caused not so much pain as pleasure. Now he understood why the moths so frantically rushed towards the destructive light, and the lemmings walked to their death in orderly rows. He understood.
Winnie the Pooh and Piglet went for honey. Came to big tree. Winnie the Pooh says: “Piglet, I’ll go upstairs on the ball, and you run home for a gun and if anything happens, shoot at the ball.” Piglet ran home and grabbed the gun, but when he returned to the clearing, Winnie the Pooh was nowhere to be found. In the clearing there was a burning car, in which a bear cub was burning, twitching in its death throes. Trying to hold back the sobs bursting from his chest, Piglet took aim and ended his suffering with one shot.
A bear was walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. He was about to rush towards her when he suddenly saw the corpse of his brother in the back seat. “Something is wrong here,” the brown one thought.
The bear saw a car burning in the forest. He got into it, but the flames died out before reaching the gas tank. The bear roared awkwardly, and, knowing that the flame would not flare up again, wandered back to the den.
Nuclear war not only destroyed all of humanity, but also left no chance of survival for the entire biosphere. The ruins of cities rose silently above the desert plains, which were continually rained down with radioactive rain. Desperate to find his relatives, the last surviving bear wandered through the forest among the burning trees. Sometimes he stopped to utter a piercing roar, full of anguish and pain, in which one could hear a reproach to the entire human race for what they had done to the earth. There was no hope. He was the last of his kind. Suddenly the bear saw a burning car - God knows how it ended up in the middle of the forest. The bear looked at the car, and the reflections of fire danced in his eyes. He knew what to do.
The bear woke up after a long hibernation. He crawled out of the den and stretched his numb limbs. The impulse reached him small brain and the bear felt that he was hungry. Deadly hungry. At the same time, his nostrils caught a strange mixture of odors of combustion products. From the whole bouquet of stench: burning rubber, acrylic paint, polyvinyl chloride, plastic, leather upholstery; he distinguished one. The only, unique smell fried meat. His reflexes worked instantly, he rushed, breaking young shoots and unprotected forest animals along the way. Finally the half-thawed soil mixed forest ended and he saw. It was something, the bear could not understand what exactly, but he knew for sure his lunch was there, inside this flaming structure. With a powerful blow, he tore off the door and rushed inside. The food was on the driver's seat, but due to the damaged bodywork, he was unable to remove it. I had to take the next passenger seat. Growling contentedly, the bear began to eat, devouring burnt clothes along with burnt meat. But this meat was the most delicious that he had ever tasted in his life. Suddenly he felt stings of flame. His skin became tense. The bear roared, but the food was so tasty, he couldn’t just abandon his prey. And then realization came to him. The realization that the moment he had been striving for all his life was coming. He was euphoric, he was engulfed in heat, he was glowing
“Mom, tell me, are there cars?”
The second bear cub asked, falling asleep.
The mother began to cry, the father clenched his fists...
The end of the bears, alas, is inevitable.
Evil fate wild beast prepares a trap.
He is destined to descend young into the kingdom of Hades.
He will find death today in a fiery chariot.
All because yesterday our thunderer got drunk
So much so that he was not even allowed to the threshold of Olympus.
He woke up in his den and felt weakness and apathy, he couldn’t do this anymore, every new thing became boring, that’s the essence, that’s life. He slowly walked along the familiar path, thinking about the upcoming conversation, he understood that she would not be happy about this, but he could no longer do anything with himself. And so he went out into a clearing in the forest and saw her, his wife driving a Mercedes. -Stevin. She exclaimed when she saw him. -Hi Shelley. he answered, “I’ve been waiting for you all day, where have you been?” She said with excitement in the fiery engine - We need to talk seriously. The brown one muttered. -Stevin are you leaving me? I was horrified by the burning car. But why Steven? -I can’t do this anymore, the spark has died out in our relationship. The bear said and left - I will take care of the children. Shelley stammered and tears flowed down her headlights...
Under the cherry blossoms
A bear burns out among a pile of iron
Spring has come...
Tires rustled rhythmically along the dark highway. A beige Volvo rolled along a small road - a narrow thread in the dark bulk of the forest. John bit his lip nervously. -It's all your fault, Shelley. The wife shuddered at the mention of her name. -He is your son, you should have looked after him. -John, but... I didn’t know... she seemed like such a sweet girl.. John slammed his hands on the steering wheel in rage - They all seem like that, Shelley! All these little sluts who just want to suck more money out of young guys! With trembling hands, John opened the glove compartment and began rummaging around for a lighter. I really wanted to smoke. Suddenly Shelley screamed. John looked sharply at the road - a dark shadow rushed towards them from the forest! John Fording didn't even have time to turn the steering wheel - a huge grizzly bear, attracted by the flame of a lighter, broke through the windshield and crushed the man in the seat. The impact spun the car, turned it over, and hit the trees with terrible force - mixing the bear, Shelley and John into one bloody heap. The flame broke out on scraps of brown skin... The car and three bodies burned out only after 3 hours.
A bear was walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. I got into it, and there was blood all over the inside and there was a refrigerator. I climbed into it and froze.
explain + and -
A bear is walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. He sat in it and burned out. (The basis, and then - its development and transformation)
- Three bears are walking through the forest: papa bear, mama bear and son bear. The bear son is always behind. Papa Bear tells him: “Don’t lag behind, otherwise all the burning cars will be occupied!”
- Two bears are walking through the forest. They see the car is on fire. While they were arguing and deciding which of them would get into it, the car went out...
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees a tank, an electric locomotive, an airplane, a yacht and a shuttle on fire. “Where is the car?” - the bear was surprised.
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees a burnt out car. “Something is wrong here!” - thought the bear.
- Fire in the forest; all the animals run away from the fire in panic. The bear asks: “Guys, what’s the matter?” They answer him: “The car is on fire!” "Car?!" - the bear couldn’t believe his ears, he went to her, sat down in her, and burned out.
- A mother bear and a baby bear are walking through the forest. They see the car is on fire. The child-bear rushes towards her, and the mother-bear stops him: “Wait, let the father-bear burn out!”
- A bear is walking through hell. He sees that there are a lot of cars, and not one is on fire. He meets another bear and says: “Is it possible to set fire to at least one car?” The second bear replies: “If it were possible, there would be paradise!”
- A bear is walking through the desert. I’m terribly tired, I’m terribly thirsty. The bear says: “I’m so tired that I can die!” Then a shovel falls on him from above: “Dig!” The bear dug and dug and dug up the burning car. He sat in it and burned out.
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees the Lada car on fire. He sat down in them, but did not burn out. The bear says: “No, this is not a car.”
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees a telephone booth. Called ambulance: “Come urgently, the bear cub is sick.” The ambulance arrived, the bear got into it, and the whole ambulance burned down.
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees two cars on fire. While I was thinking about which one to burn in, two more bears came up, each got into a car and burned.
- A bear came to the car dealership. He asks: “Well, which of your cars burns best?”
- A wolf is walking through the forest. Suddenly a crowd of bears runs towards us. "What's happened? What's happened?" - asks the wolf. The bears answer him: “There’s a fire in the parking lot!!”
- A bear is walking through the forest. Sees - whole line there are cars standing, and some have already burned out, others are on fire, and others are about to catch fire. The bear goes to one of the cars, but several other bears stand nearby and tell him: “Wait! Queue!"
- A bear is walking across the field. He sees that the tractor is on fire. The bear pushed the tractor into the forest, sat in it and burned to death.
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. The bear is about to get into it, and the bear sits there and says: “Get in, we’ll not only get burned, but we’ll also have sex!”
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees that the motorcycle is on fire. He sat on it and extinguished it with his ass...
- A bear is walking across the bridge. He sees a car on the bridge on fire. He gets into it, and the bridge under the car collapses, it falls into the river and goes out. “Not fate,” thought the bear.
- The bear stole a car, parked it in the forest next to the mother-in-law's house and set it on fire. Then he went to his mother-in-law and said: “Look out the window.” The mother-in-law looked out the window: “The car is on fire!” She sat in it and burned out.
- Papa bear and baby bear are walking through the forest. They see the car is on fire. The child-bear rushes towards her, and the papa-bear stops him: “Where are you going in hell ahead of dad!” Papa Bear got into the car and burned out.
- A bear is walking through the forest in the evening, completely drunk; sings this song: “Evening burning car in the native forest! She brings up so many thoughts!”
- A bear (angry as hell) came to the fire station. He asks: “Who put out my burning car and put it out?”
- The hare's car broke down. A bear walks by: “Help?” “Yes, if it’s not difficult.” “What’s so difficult about that?” - said the bear, set fire to the car, got into it and burned.
- A car is driving along the highway and is on fire. The traffic cops stop her, and inside is a bear. The traffic cops ask: “Bear, what are you doing?” The bear replies: “Like what? I'm burning! Can’t you see it?”
- A car with number 666 is driving along the highway. It is stopped by a traffic cop, and inside is a bear. The traffic cop asks: “Why do you have such a number?” The bear replies: “Especially for you!” Traffic cop: How's that? Bear: “Sit down, you’ll find out!” The traffic cop got into the car, and it caught fire, and the bear and the traffic cop were burned.
- A car with number 777 is driving along the highway. It is stopped by a traffic cop, and inside is a bear. The traffic cop asks: “Why do you have such a number?” The bear replies: “This is the number of luck! Today is a good day to get burned in a car!” Then the car caught fire, and the bear and the traffic cop burned to death.
- A wolf stands on the highway and votes, catching a car. One stops, and there is a bear. The wolf says to him: “No, bear, go on, I’ll wait for the next car.” The bear answers him: “There won’t be a next one for you!” I stuffed the wolf into the car and drove on. And soon the car caught fire, and the bear and wolf burned.
- A bear and a wolf are walking through the forest. They see the car is on fire. The wolf says: “Where is the phone? We need to call the firefighters urgently!” The bear replies: “Don’t even think about it.” I got into the car and burned out.
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees that the toilet is on fire. The bear says: “Why do I need a burning toilet? I’ll continue looking for the burning car.”
- A bear is walking down the street. He sees a fire truck on fire. The bear says: “Ha ha! They saved others, but they can’t save themselves!” I got into the car and burned out.
- A bear is walking through the forest. It smells like smoke. Moves on. He hears a light crackling. Full of hope, he goes further, and there the wolves roast the elk on the fire. “That’s a big deal!” - the bear was upset.
- Four bears are walking through the forest: papa bear, mama bear, son bear and daughter bear. They see the bus is on fire. Papa Bear says, “Great! There’s enough room for everyone!” They all sat in it together and burned.
- A bear is walking through the university. Sees - dissertation council. A bear comes into it and says: “I want to defend my doctoral dissertation on the topic “Burning bears and the physics of ultra-high temperatures.” They answer him: “Yes, even tomorrow!” The next day, a bear drove a burning car into the university, and the university burned down (as did the bear and the car).
- At the edge of the forest, the animals discovered a sculptural monument: “Eternal flame in a car with an ever-burning bear.”
- Two bears are walking through the forest - an old one and a young one. They see the car is on fire. old bear says: “Here, learn the right way while I’m alive!” He got into the car and burned out (and the young man moved on).
- An elk is walking through the forest. He sees that the car is on fire, and a bear is sitting inside and is also on fire. I called the firefighters: “Come urgently, there’s a car on fire, and there’s a bear inside!” They answer him: “Come to your senses! If a bear is on fire in a car, then it can’t be put out! Get out of here before you burn yourself." The moose got scared and ran away, but the bear burned to death in the car.
- A bear is walking through a landfill. He sees that the car is standing, but is not on fire. The bear says: “What kind of trouble is this?”, and suddenly hears the answer: “It’s not for nothing that she was thrown into a landfill!”
- A bear is walking down the street. He sees that the car service has caught fire. The bear screamed: “Hurray!” They ask him: “Why are you yelling??”, and he answers: “My wife gave birth!!”
- A bear is walking down the street. He sees firefighters putting out a burning car. The bear yelled: “Oh, you ugly, pranksters! What are you doing??” He walked up to the car, scattered the firefighters, got into the car and burned out.
- A bear came out of the forest and walked along the road. He sees a presidential motorcade coming. The bear stops him and says: “My political convictions do not allow me to be inactive!” Then the presidential car caught fire, a bear got into it and burned down along with the president.
- A bear votes on the highway and catches a car. Of course, everyone knows where this can lead, and no one is stopping. The bear laments: “Oh, there is no kindness in people! But I won’t burn out, I need to go to my mother-in-law for pancakes!”
- A bear walks through the forest, collecting pine cones. He sees one lump burning, a little further away another, then a third, and so on. The bear walked over the burning pine cones. He sees a car made of pine cones and it’s on fire. A bear got into it and did not burn, because it was a dummy car, and not a real car.
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees a forest fire. "Spit!" - says the bear, and calmly walks through the fire. He walks further through the forest. He sees a river of fire. "Spit!" - says the bear, and calmly fords the river. He walks further through the forest. He sees animals jumping over the fire; and they just can’t jump over - the hare is burned, the wolf is burned, the fox is burned. "Spit!" - says the bear, and calmly jumps over the fire. He walks further through the forest. He sees the car on fire. “But don’t give a damn here!” - says the bear, got into the car and burned out.
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. He is about to get into it, but then a wolf on a skating rink drives by, demolishes the car and completely destroys it. The bear caught up with the wolf, tore it into pieces and broke the roller, but the burning car still could not be returned, and the bear was very, very upset.
- (“About how Putin defeated the bear”). A bear is walking through the Kremlin. He sees Putin standing. The bear says: “Come on, give me the presidency, otherwise I’ll tear you apart!” Putin says: “I’ll soak you in the toilet now!” Bear: “Nothing will work out for you!” Putin: “Let’s try!” Bear: “Yes, as much as you like!” And went to the toilet; We came in and the car was on fire. The bear immediately got into the car and burned to death. This is how Putin defeated the bear.
- A bear rides a bicycle. He sees a swan, a crayfish and a pike pulling a car somewhere. The bear says: “Shall we swing without looking?” They answer him: “Come on!” The swan, crayfish and pike began to pull the bicycle, and the bear left in the car, drove to the forest, set it on fire, got into it and burned.
- It's the bear's birthday. The animals, to please him, brought him a burning car. A bear got into a car and burned to death on his birthday. This is said to be the reason why William Shakespeare died on his birthday; Shakespeare was a bear.
- A bear is walking through the forest. He sees a telephone booth. I called the taxi: “Hello, taxi? The bear speaks. Do you understand what I need? They answer him: “We understand! We will send you a VIP class taxi. Burn in comfort!” The bear says: “Great!” The ending is a bit predictable.
- A bear is driving across the steppe in a car. Suddenly the sky darkens and a thunderstorm begins. The bear thinks like this: “Now I’ll get out of the car, and lightning will strike it, it will catch fire, and then ha-ha!!” He stopped and got out of the car, and lightning hit him, not the car. But nothing happened to the bear, since the bear dies only when it burns in the car. Ha ha!
To the question What is the joke of a burning bear? A bear was walking through the forest, saw a car, climbed into it and burned, what's the joke? Tell me, asked by the author Wake up the best answer is
“A bear is walking through the forest and sees a car on fire. I got into it and burned out” - everyone has probably heard this joke. Sometimes the narrator also adds “The End” or “Shovel” if the listener’s face is very perplexed. However, no one has attempted to explain what the joke is for a long time, although such questions arise constantly. It is believed that this anecdote is especially attractive precisely because of its meaninglessness. But, unlike other “abstract” or “drug” jokes, it enjoys unprecedented popularity: it has many variations, it is drawn on T-shirts, it is used as a universal comment, etc.. .
A man got into a program with Trachtenberg and nothing came into his head except a bearded and stupid joke about a Bear who was walking through the forest, saw a burning car, got into it and burned out. The man begins:
- Well... All in all.. . A bear was walking through the forest and saw a burning car...
Trachtenberg:
- I sat in it and burned!
And then the man was struck by a frantic thought and he said:
- Nope! He moved on! He walked and walked and saw a big burning truck...
Trachtenberg:
- Well, got into it and burned out? - Trachtenberg looks a little confused.
Man:
- Nope!! ! He went further, which means he went out onto the take-off field, and on this field he saw a burning plane...
Trachtenberg, unable to resist:
- NUUU? Got into it and burned out??! !
The man finishes with a sense of accomplishment:
- Nope! He fucking turned around, walked to the first car, got into it and burned out! !
....
An Arctic bear was walking (this is important, Arctic!) in the Arctic Circle. Suddenly he sees that the car is covered with snow. Well, he sat in it and froze.
There is a car standing in the forest at the edge of the forest,
Gasoline streams from a broken tank,
An old tire burns out in the trunk,
There's only one corpse roasting in the salon.
This corpse of a suicide bear,
That I decided to get even with my life at once,
Walking through the forest listening to birdsong,
I decided to do it here and now.
Suddenly, as if hearing his thoughts,
A bright fire broke out at the edge of the forest.
Here the skin is smoking, here the skin is burning,
The bear does not blame anyone for its death.
A bear was walking through the forest and saw a car on fire. I just wanted to get into it, and there was already another bear on fire.
A bear was walking through the forest, saw a car on fire, climbed into it and put it out.
A bear was walking through the forest, he saw a stone, and on it there was an inscription: if you go to the left, you will burn in the car, if you go to the right, you will burn in the car, if you go straight, you will burn in the car. The bear went to the right and saw that the car was on fire. I got into the car and burned out.
A bear was walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. And he moved on, because animals are not capable of realizing such complex phenomena.
Yesterday, investigators found the burned-out carcass of a KIA car in Bitsevsky Park. In the back of the car was the corpse of a large mammal, presumably a bear.
The car was burning in the forest. Inexplicably, she attracted animals.
A bear is walking through the forest, sees a car on fire, gets into it and burns out, a deer passes by, sees a bear on fire, goes to save it and also burns out... A bunny is running, sees this picture, climbed into the back seat because there was a deer in the front seat and burned out, damn it
“A bear is walking through the forest and sees a car on fire. I sat in it and burned out” - everyone has probably heard this joke. Sometimes the narrator also adds “The End” or “Shovel” if the listener’s face is very perplexed. However, no one has attempted to explain what the joke is for a long time, although such questions arise constantly. It is believed that this anecdote is especially attractive precisely because of its meaninglessness. But, unlike other “abstract” or “drug” jokes, it enjoys unprecedented popularity: it has many variations, it is drawn on T-shirts, it is used as a universal comment, etc.
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Burn, burn, you are my bear
A man got into a program with Trachtenberg and nothing came into his head except a bearded and stupid joke about a Bear who was walking through the forest, saw a burning car, got into it and burned out. The man begins:
- Well... well... a bear was walking through the forest and saw a burning car...
Trachtenberg:
- I sat in it and burned!
And then the man was struck by a frantic thought and he said:
- Nope! He moved on! He walked and walked and saw a big burning truck...
Trachtenberg:
- Well, got into it and burned out? - Trachtenberg looks a little confused.
Man:
- Nope!!! He went further, which means he went out onto the take-off field, and on this field he saw a burning plane...
Trachtenberg, unable to resist:
- NUUU? Got into it and burned out??!!!
The man finishes with a sense of accomplishment:
- Nope! He fucking turned around, walked to the first car, got into it and burned out!!
An Arctic bear was walking (this is important, Arctic!) in the Arctic Circle. Suddenly he sees that the car is covered with snow. Well, he sat in it and froze.
There is a car standing in the forest at the edge of the forest,
Gasoline streams from a broken tank,
An old tire burns out in the trunk,
There's only one corpse roasting in the salon.
This corpse of a suicide bear,
That I decided to get even with my life at once,
Walking through the forest listening to birdsong,
I decided to do it here and now.
Suddenly, as if hearing his thoughts,
A bright fire broke out at the edge of the forest.
Here the skin is smoking, here the skin is burning,
The bear does not blame anyone for its death.
A bear was walking through the forest and saw a car on fire. I just wanted to get into it, and there was already another bear on fire.
A bear was walking through the forest, saw a car on fire, climbed into it and put it out.
A bear was walking through the forest, he saw a stone, and on it there was an inscription: if you go to the left, you will burn in the car, if you go to the right, you will burn in the car, if you go straight, you will burn in the car. The bear went to the right and saw that the car was on fire. I got into the car and burned out.
A bear was walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. And he moved on, because animals are not capable of realizing such complex phenomena.
Yesterday, investigators found the burned-out carcass of a KIA car in Bitsevsky Park. In the back of the car was the corpse of a large mammal, presumably a bear.
The car was burning in the forest. Inexplicably, she attracted animals.
A bear is walking through the forest, sees a car on fire, gets into it and burns, a deer passes by, sees a bear on fire, goes to save it and also burns... A bunny runs, sees this picture, climbed into the back seat because the deer is in the front seat and burned , damn it
The bear was walking through the forest when he suddenly saw a burning car. Suddenly he was suddenly drawn to this radiant heat, to this miniature man-made apocalypse. He roared, stood on his hind legs and rushed towards the smoking car. Tearing off the back door, he squeezed into the cabin; the hellish heat caused not so much pain as pleasure. Now he understood why the moths so frantically rushed towards the destructive light, and the lemmings walked to their death in orderly rows. He understood.
Winnie the Pooh and Piglet went for honey. We came to a big tree. Winnie the Pooh says: “Piglet, I’ll go upstairs on the ball, and you run home for a gun and if anything happens, shoot at the ball.” Piglet ran home and grabbed the gun, but when he returned to the clearing, Winnie the Pooh was nowhere to be found. In the clearing there was a burning car, in which a bear cub was burning, twitching in its death throes. Trying to hold back the sobs bursting from his chest, Piglet took aim and ended his suffering with one shot.
A bear was walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. He was about to rush towards her when he suddenly saw the corpse of his brother in the back seat. “Something is wrong here,” the brown one thought.
The bear saw a car burning in the forest. He got into it, but the flames died out before reaching the gas tank. The bear roared awkwardly, and, knowing that the flame would not flare up again, wandered back to the den.
Nuclear war not only destroyed all of humanity, but also left no chance of survival for the entire biosphere. The ruins of cities rose silently above the desert plains, which were continually rained down with radioactive rain. Desperate to find his relatives, the last surviving bear wandered through the forest among the burning trees. Sometimes he stopped to utter a piercing roar, full of anguish and pain, in which one could hear a reproach to the entire human race for what they had done to the earth. There was no hope. He was the last of his kind. Suddenly the bear saw a burning car - God knows how it ended up in the middle of the forest. The bear looked at the car, and the reflections of fire danced in his eyes. He knew what to do.
The bear woke up after a long winter hibernation. He crawled out of the den and stretched his numb limbs. The impulse reached his little brain and the bear felt that he was hungry. Deadly hungry. At the same time, his nostrils caught a strange mixture of odors of combustion products. From the whole bouquet of stench: burning rubber, acrylic paint, polyvinyl chloride, plastic, leather upholstery; he distinguished one. The only, unique smell is the smell of fried meat. His reflexes worked instantly, he rushed, breaking young shoots and unprotected forest animals along the way. Finally, the half-thawed soil of the mixed forest ended and he saw. It was something, the bear could not understand what exactly, but he knew for sure his lunch was there, inside this flaming structure. With a powerful blow, he tore off the door and rushed inside. The food was on the driver's seat, but due to the damaged bodywork, he was unable to remove it. I had to take the next passenger seat. Growling contentedly, the bear began to eat, devouring burnt clothes along with burnt meat. But this meat was the most delicious that he had ever tasted in his life. Suddenly he felt stings of flame. His skin became tense. The bear roared, but the food was so tasty, he couldn’t just abandon his prey. And then realization came to him. The realization that the moment he had been striving for all his life was coming. He was euphoric, he was engulfed in heat, he was glowing...
“Mom, tell me, are there cars?”
The second bear cub asked, falling asleep.
The mother began to cry, the father clenched his fists...
The end of the bears, alas, is inevitable.
Evil fate is preparing a trap for the wild beast.
He is destined to descend young into the kingdom of Hades.
He will find death today in a fiery chariot.
All because yesterday our thunderer got drunk
So much so that he was not even allowed to the threshold of Olympus.
He woke up in his den and felt weakness and apathy, he couldn’t do this anymore, every new thing became boring, that’s the essence, that’s life. He slowly walked along the familiar path, thinking about the upcoming conversation, he understood that she would not be happy about this, but he could no longer do anything with himself. And so he went out into a clearing in the forest and saw her, his wife driving a Mercedes. -Stevin. She exclaimed when she saw him. -Hi Shelley. he answered, “I’ve been waiting for you all day, where have you been?” She said with excitement in the fiery engine - We need to talk seriously. The brown one muttered. -Stevin are you leaving me? I was horrified by the burning car. But why Steven? -I can’t do this anymore, the spark has died out in our relationship. The bear said and left - I will take care of the children. Shelley stammered and tears flowed down her headlights...
Under the cherry blossoms
A bear burns out among a pile of iron
Spring has come...
Tires rustled rhythmically along the dark highway. A beige Volvo rolled along a small road - a narrow thread in the dark bulk of the forest. John bit his lip nervously. -It's all your fault, Shelley. The wife shuddered at the mention of her name. -He is your son, you should have looked after him. -John, but... I didn’t know... she seemed like such a sweet girl.. John slammed his hands on the steering wheel in rage - They all seem like that, Shelley! All these little sluts who just want to suck more money out of young guys! With trembling hands, John opened the glove compartment and began rummaging around for a lighter. I really wanted to smoke. Suddenly Shelley screamed. John looked sharply at the road - a dark shadow rushed towards them from the forest! John Fording didn't even have time to turn the steering wheel - a huge grizzly bear, attracted by the flame of a lighter, broke through the windshield and crushed the man in the seat. The impact spun the car, turned it over, and hit the trees with terrible force - mixing the bear, Shelley and John into one bloody heap. The flame broke out on scraps of brown skin... The car and three bodies burned out only after 3 hours.
A bear was walking through the forest. He sees the car on fire. I got into it, and there was blood all over the inside and there was a refrigerator. I climbed into it and froze.
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