According to psychologists, true love is characterized by the same features as friendship - unity of goals, life principles, beliefs, requirements for each other. Therefore, in essence, distinguishing passion from love is not so difficult. But if you still haven't figured out what the nature of your feelings is, ELLE provides five signs that can easily determine the true nature of your experiences.
First sign
If in the presence of a partner you begin to experience anxiety, your heartbeat quickens, and the world around literally ceases to exist (the reason for this is the inability to focus on anything other than the object of your desire), all the signs of physical dependence on a person are visible. If even after several months these sensations do not give way to calm and relaxation in the presence of your chosen one, it’s time to sound the alarm - you are developing a subconscious dependence on your partner, which is unlikely to lead to anything good. Only those where calm and a permanent sense of security reign can be called harmonious relationships.
Second sign
You constantly want to be close to your partner, and even if you have to part, you start bombarding your lover with messages asking where he is and what he’s doing. Believe me, total control is a bad way to tie a man to you. Sooner or later he will get tired of this, and he will deliberately hide his location from you just in order to “win back” at least a little personal space.
Third sign
Any conflict ends in bed. On the one hand, this is a good opportunity to bring a little fire into the relationship. But it is worth sounding the alarm if problems cannot be resolved in any other way, for example, through constructive dialogue.
Fourth sign
Passion develops into addiction at the moment when sex fades into the background, and the need for strong emotions remains, so you begin to inflate conflicts from scratch. For loving couples, everything happens exactly the opposite: after the first months of passion end, an even and calm relationship begins, in which each partner feels comfortable.
Fifth sign
All-consuming passion can sometimes play a cruel joke on you. Due to the fact that you are dependent on your partner and are so afraid of losing “the source of your bright emotions,” you begin to forgive unacceptable things: rudeness, neglect, barbs addressed to you. Please note that a truly loving man will never allow himself to offend his other half, but rather will try to feed her self-confidence.
Sometimes it happens that a person thinks that he has finally found his true, great love, and then she soon dies a tragic death. In this case, most likely it was not love, but passion and desire. When a man and a woman receive strong emotions from communicating with each other, they often confuse these two completely different concepts. In this article we will tell you how to determine whether you are experiencing passion or love.
It is very easy to understand the difference between love and passion if you imagine these feelings in the form of fire. Passion resembles the flame of a burning pine tree, which is rich in resin. It burns with a sparkling, hot fire, but it does not last long. Now imagine an oak tree burning. The fire burns slowly, and a persistent flame spreads along the trunk for many hours. Oak may not produce as much initial flame and heat as pine, but oak wins every time when it comes to durability.
True love is a spiritual feeling. It is much deeper than passion. This is a connection that is established between partners on the basis of admiration, respect, support, emotional fulfillment and affection. Love is when you care about your other half more than about yourself. Often a couple in love is united by the same goals in life, they cooperate with each other to achieve them. Often true love involves self-sacrifice. Over time, love does not decrease, unlike passion, but on the contrary, it becomes deeper and stronger.
To make it clearer, we suggest looking at the main differences between passion and love. Based on these differences, you will be able to determine for yourself whether you are experiencing fleeting passion or true love.
. When the source of a relationship is passion alone, one of the partners positions himself in the relationship based on egocentrism.
The main goal of a person is to master the object of his own passion, animal desire. A person in love strives to please his partner; he is ready to compromise and change for the sake of his soulmate.
. Also, the main difference between love and passion is the duration of the relationship. Passion is always fleeting. It takes place until one of the couple loses interest in the other. Love drives a person for many years. If over time you lost interest in a person you previously liked, it was only infatuation.
. Passion and love are different on an emotional level. Passion is raging, strong, overshadowing. Love, in turn, is meaningful and calm.
. A person in love strives to get to know his or her soulmate, to understand how he or she lives. The main difference between love and passion is interest in the individual. A loving person is aware that the chosen one or chosen one has some shortcomings, but he is ready to accept them.
. A person who truly loves is very patient. He is ready to wait quite a long time for his happiness. He lives with hopes for the future and does everything to ensure that everything works out in the best possible way. A person who is possessed by passion lives one day at a time, even when he understands that certain actions may backfire in the future.
. Love allows you to enjoy just a smile, simple communication, talking on the phone. Passion, in turn, requires the satisfaction of animal instincts. Moreover, passion spreads simultaneously to several people, while you can love the only one or the only one.
Now you know how you can distinguish passion from love. Be happy!
IN Is there anything brighter and more desirable in the arsenal of human feelings and emotions than love and passion? They rarely walk separately, more and more together, intertwined in one knot and confusing our already sometimes complex relationships. Let's try to figure out what is love and what is passion, and which feeling is stronger.
What is passion?
In order to avoid biased assessments and untruthful comments, we turned to Dahl’s explanatory dictionary for an explanation of what passion is: “Passion is a spiritual impulse for something, moral thirst, greed, greed, unaccountable attraction, unbridled, unreasonable desire... A person in passion worse than a beast."
How is passion physically expressed?
- cardiopalmus
- distracted attention
- involuntary dilation of pupils
- "goosebumps" on the body
- a state of sexual arousal occurs more often than usual
- often throws you either cold or hot
- the body is not at rest
- hands may shake
- a person may involuntarily constantly jerk his legs, etc.
What is a person like in passion?
1. In his blood is a cocktail of feelings of joy, excitement, and anxiety. Often there are so many ingredients in a cocktail that it is difficult for you to determine exactly what feelings you are experiencing. Since feelings are predominantly positive, passion is often confused with love.
2. He may experience new and unusual desires. For example, running in the morning, swimming, drawing, music. I want to take care of others, feed the birds, etc.
3. Experiences a strong desire to constantly be near the object of passion, to constantly touch it. Sometimes this desire reaches the level of obsession.
4. Wants to be a part of the life of the object of passion, and the more part, the better.
Psychologists say that at its very core, passion is physiological arousal, everything else is just its shades or consequences.
What is love?
We decided to turn again to Dahl’s dictionary for clarification, but, to our surprise, we did not find a definition of love. It was probably not easy even for Dahl! We will proceed from the fact that love is “a feeling of deep affection, devotion to someone or something, based on a commonality of interests, ideals, on the willingness to give one’s strength to a common cause or to the salvation or preservation of someone.”
How is love expressed?
They say that a loving person glows from within, which is especially noticeable by the characteristic sparkle in the eyes. However, this is increasingly a definition for novels and short stories, although most likely there is a physiological justification for this.
A loving person is calm and balanced, so he does not have such vivid manifestations of external behavior as a person in passion. Someone who loves smooth movements and speech, harmonious facial expressions, and a calm voice.
Doctors say that love, especially mutual love, has a positive effect on a woman’s hormonal system. And this is almost the main thing in “external” beauty, so a loving woman’s skin, hair condition, figure, etc. improve.
How does a lover behave?
— Able to adequately assess one’s feelings, behavior and attitude. In the article “to love” V. Dahl writes that this is “... the preference of someone or something by will, by will.”
- Calmness and balance.
- Feels a desire to show care, to protect the object of love.
- Realizes the imperfection of a loved one and is able to consciously accept this fact.
— Shows caution in his actions regarding a loved one in order not to harm or violate his freedom and personal space.
- Able to not be offended or forgive.
- Feels a desire to please a loved one and do good to him without expecting the same reciprocal behavior.
- Acts on the basis of everything written above. Love without action is just eloquent passion.
Love and passion are two opposites that are based on radically different principles: give and take.
Love or passion? How to distinguish these two concepts and understand your feelings for another person? You just need to listen to yourself and analyze the emotions you experience. Then you will definitely not be mistaken in your assessment.
What is love
According to psychologists, love consists of three components:
- Intimacy is about closeness and a sense of partnership. As the couple gets closer, the intimacy becomes stronger. True, in ordinary life it does not manifest itself in any way, but in a difficult crisis situation it is intimacy that is most strongly expressed.
- Sexual attraction is strongest at the very beginning of a relationship, when people are just getting to know each other. In a long marriage, sexual attraction fades into the background.
- Commitments only become more important over the years. Moreover, this is true for both long-term and short-term relationships.
If all three components are present, love can be called ideal. All couples strive for it. Of course, it is possible to achieve such an ideal relationship, but maintaining it for a long time is very difficult. Feelings like this never last long. Of course, if one of the components disappears, the relationship will not end, it’s just that ideal love is transformed into something else.
Signs of love
How to recognize? Just watch yourself and you will understand everything. A loving person always wants to see the object of his feelings, wants to be as close to him as possible. He has an irresistible desire to be around all the time. Lovers strive to look into the eyes of their loved one. Even if a lover makes a speech in front of a huge audience, subconsciously he will look for the eyes of his beloved to look into them and understand how he or she feels about what was said.
A person in love strives to show his beloved signs of attention, to do pleasant things for him. You can recognize a person who is in love by the willingness with which he provides services to you. If a person is in love, he will readily fulfill your request, but an indifferent person will find a thousand reasons to get out of even the easiest task.
Over time, as a couple grows closer and gets to know each other better, more serious signs of love may be noticed. One of the first is intimacy. Loving people do not put on a mask; they can sympathize and rejoice with their loved one. Lovers also experience jealousy, without it, too. It is important that it does not turn into manic obsession. The most important feeling in love is self-sacrifice. Perhaps a loving person does not shower you with daily attentions, gifts and compliments, but if he is ready to immediately rush to your aid at your call, rest assured that his love is real.
What is passion
An intense desire to possess a person, often regardless of social norms and rules, is usually called passion. Passion itself becomes the meaning of a person’s life. It is typical that a person only wants to possess the object of his passion physically, and we are not talking about tenderness and care here.
To some extent, passion is one of the components of the feeling of love. It is included in the concept of sexual attraction. But on its own, without intimacy and commitment, passion destroys both people.
Signs of passion
The feeling of passion is based entirely on physical attraction and the desire to possess. At the same time, a person does not think about the real state of things. In his imagination, the object of worship is a person without flaws. This explains the fact that the feeling of passion passes very quickly as soon as a person begins to realize that his partner is very far from the ideal depicted in the imagination.
Let us list the main signs of passion:
- A person is only interested in his partner's appearance.
- Conversations on any topic are not attractive, only sex is of interest.
- A person is not inclined to talk about his real feelings; all his thoughts are focused on his own fantasies.
- Immediately after sex, a person tends to leave rather than spend some time together.
- Your union is more like a relationship between lovers than friends.
Passion and love: how to distinguish
First, decide how you or your partner position themselves in your relationship. Love is characterized by the desire to give pleasure to a partner. If a person experiences only passion, he is concentrated only on his desires. Passion is based only on physical attraction and disappears very quickly. We are not talking about mutual understanding, kinship of souls and mutual respect here.
Passion is characterized by strong emotions; a person in such a state cannot think about anything other than the object of his worship. Love is a more meaningful and calm feeling. Love is characterized by interest in a person’s personality, and not just in his appearance. Passion lives one day at a time. A person subject to passion does not think about long-term relationships and their development. He is ready to actively pursue the object of his desire, despite all circumstances.
A loving person can experience pleasure even from simple communication and talking on the phone. For passion, the most important thing is the satisfaction of sexual needs.
The word "passion" is quite common today. It is not something new, like “laser” or “computer,” or something abstruse or rare. which can raise a lot of questions. But still, this word, like any one that characterizes the area of feelings, has many connotations, and it is worth figuring out which ones.
What is this feeling
What is passion? Efremova’s explanatory dictionary of the Russian language gives the following interpretation of this concept: “passion” is a strong feeling that arises on an instinctive level. This is a strong passion, craving or inclination towards something.
According to Dmitriev's explanatory dictionary, the meaning of the word “passion” is defined as follows: a strong feeling, physical or sexual attraction of one person to another. It is also a healthy interest in some activity or profession.
Ushakov’s explanatory dictionary defines the term “passion” in a similar way. What is passion? This is a very strong sensual attraction that arises in a person subconsciously, instinctively.
Thus, after conducting a literary analysis, we can confidently say that this is still a feeling.
The seven most terrible human passions
Also, quite often this term is used not to describe attraction to a person, but to describe his secret desires that cannot be curbed.
Such passions include the seven of humanity. Many people know this legend. The list of sins includes: pride, gluttony, greed, laziness, envy, anger and lust.
These seven feelings and actions are considered passions because they are quite difficult to restrain. Each of us has been angry many times in our lives, sometimes unknowingly envied, or been too proud of ourselves, gluttonous or lazy, this is a self-evident fact. And this is another criterion for understanding what kind of feeling it is - passion.
Passion and love in adolescence
All people in life sooner or later experience the feeling of passion. And very often it happens that it is confused with love. Why is this happening?
This happens especially often at a young age, when young people and girls first begin to experience feelings for the opposite sex. Then teenagers confuse passion with love and often confuse themselves with this. After all, teenagers experience, rather, passion. What do feelings mean at this age? In this case, they can be compared with falling in love. It's like It's not about sexual attraction at all. Girls fall in love with boys, and boys fall in love with girls. But they begin to experience love at a more conscious age.
"Adult" passions
If we talk about adults, it is worth noting that passion manifests itself a little differently in men and women.
Men are more hot-tempered and reactive in this matter. If a man experiences passion for a woman, the object of his desire, then he becomes excited very quickly, blood rushes to the brain, figuratively speaking. A man tries to use all the methods and methods available to him to satisfy his desire as quickly as possible.
But when a woman experiences passion, her actions are more measured. Women tend to think a lot about different things and analyze things. Therefore, as a rule, a lady achieves the object of her desire less impulsively, becomes emotionally aroused more slowly, and tries to keep the situation under control, restraining passion. She guesses that such a phenomenon can lead to negative results.
Of course, sometimes the opposite happens. People are different, and everyone can behave in their own way, uncharacteristically, regardless of whether they are a woman. This is influenced by factors such as emotional and physical health, temperament, a person’s lifestyle, or events that have happened or are happening in life.
How to recognize passion
As in adolescence, adults also tend to confuse the concepts of “love” and “passion”. What love is in adulthood is already becoming more clear. That this is not only fun, an eternal candy-bouquet period, but also constant work on oneself, compromises, concessions and mutual understanding. But passion is a more frivolous and irresponsible feeling.
And often one might think that when we experience an irresistible attraction to a person, we love him. But you need to clearly understand that love is the spiritual closeness of two people, and passion is a feeling based on desire.
There are two basic differences between these feelings:
1) Manifestations of feelings. Of course, there can be no relationship between people, a man and a woman, without passion. But there is a difference. If relationships are built on passion, then in such a tandem, as a rule, people do not take into account the desires of other people, but only their own, since passion is a selfish feeling.
2) Transience. Passion arises quickly and can quickly “disappear” depending on various factors influencing a person. In most cases, when a person achieves what he wants, the passion fades. This is its difference from love. But sometimes it happens that passion develops into a stronger and deeper feeling.
Thus, everyone can understand and set a framework for the concept of “passion” in a slightly different way: what is infatuation, craving, love, and what is true love.
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